My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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