i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize