just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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