I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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