It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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