I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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