Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
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