JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
only you would photoshop your dick
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize