After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
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I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
how drunk are you?
Several
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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