so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
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He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
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I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize