all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Terrible idea I love it
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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