john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Randomize
