Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize