Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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