dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize