i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
You pole danced in your parka.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize