how can u be prego again
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Well I just put wine in my tea
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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