Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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