Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize