just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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