Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
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