Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
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