I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize