drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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