new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize