its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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