And the cops told us we were all naked.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize