(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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