We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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