actually, I'm a sock model
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize