These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize