we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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