it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize