How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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