Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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