In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize