I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
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yo everyone went to the hospital last night
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
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As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
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