I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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