you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Terrible idea I love it
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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