Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize