Plan B is the new Plan A
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize