if you like me you must not know who I am
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize