i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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