thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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