watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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