Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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