Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize