:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
What a dumb baby whore.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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