So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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