I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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